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View Full Version : I've lost my Mojo!



Jacaranda
08 Mar 14, 16:20
Hi all,
I trust posters opinions on this forum so thought it might be a good idea for me to get things off my chest.I've lost my mojo!

I am married,kids left home quite a long time ago,and neither of them live near me.The eldest followed her partner to Cornwall for his uni placement,and the youngest left home for uni and managed to secure a good job in the same city as where she went to uni.I actually think I am suffering from depression.Yes I've had down times throughout my life,but this has lasted probably over a year.I just don't feel happy anymore.

We were supposed to relocate back to Australia 2 yrs ago but my OH changed his mind,so in that respect I feel trapped.Most of my family live in Australia,apart from my aussie kids who,m I hardly see.I don't really enjoy my work.My boss is an egotistical control freak who has mental health issues (Last year he showed me his arms,he had self harmed by cutting them,horrendous and deeply disturbing),so working with this guy is like walking on egg shells.

The only good thing about my job is the fact my big boss has agreed to me taking 3 mths unpaid leave to return to Australia.Now you'd think I'd jump at the opportunity right?I have the money to go,but something is stopping me.Last time I returned for a holiday and I seriously did not want to board the flight back to the UK.

I know from the outside people will say I should be grateful for what I have,secure job and housing,my health ect but I just do not feel lucky.I've just had two weeks holiday and should be feeling on top of the world,but the truth is,I go back to work on Monday and I really am not looking forward to it.

I was going to start meditating whilst I was on holiday but did'nt.I just cannot get the ummph (?) I need to really do anything.What am I going to do? Your thoughts/help would be greatly appreciated.

Thankyou.xx

Trilaksana
08 Mar 14, 18:24
I know from the outside people will say I should be grateful for what I have,secure job and housing,my health ect but I just do not feel lucky.I've just had two weeks holiday and should be feeling on top of the world,but the truth is,I go back to work on Monday and I really am not looking forward to it.


I actually disagree. Yes being grateful is good but I think you should probably try to find a job in which your boss isn't a "egotistical control freak who has mental health issues." I can't say I blame you for not looking forward to work. I think you'd have more of a problem if you were looking forward to it!

I think you posting this on here shows that you want to make a change in your life. However only you know how you want things to change.

There's my two cents.

Jacaranda
09 Mar 14, 08:59
Thanks Trilaksana for replying.I did say to my OH yesterday I feel alot of my issues are work related.In the 18mths I have worked with this guy,I have walked off site twice due to frustration!I have worked now for 37 yrs and in all my working history have never walked off a job!

My boss is gay.Not that thats a problem to me as such,but he makes a huge drama over something so trivial.He is so full of hate for our colleaques,even wishing some were dead!Not nice!I'm thinking right now I might take the unpaid leave option for 3 mths back to Oz.Its the only way forward for me so sort out my feelings/thoughts/future.

My OH is worried naturally that I won't return back to the UK,but he did have to option of moving over there himself with me 2 yrs ago and declined,so I guess thats his problem.xx