View Full Version : Thank you for listening; need guidance

02 Oct 13, 16:26
Hello all, I sincerely hope that I have not missed a thread regarding this;

I am relatively new to practice, though my understanding of our nature is one of some clarity; the problem I am facing is that the people with whom I live, are incredibly nihilistic; my family was raised in such a way that we were taught to believe in nothing, and have no interest in the finer workings of life. Until recently i also held this view, due to an awakening of sorts, I see the bigger picture. My first reaction was one of wanting to tell everyone with definitive proof what I have learned. I quickly found that quantum physics and personal investigation is thought by my family and peers of as unnecessary, boring, and hokey. I have really no one to speak about any of this with, other than a center that is quite far from me and because of time and travel, takes a lot from my family when I attend (though I know the importance of doing so, I am being considered selfish). My question is this... If this is a common occurrence, our family and loved ones not understanding our seemingly religious pursuits, and not really listening when we tell them why we are doing it., how have any of you dealt with this? Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post, any information is greatly appreciated, even if it is redirection to another thread. Thank you!!!

02 Oct 13, 17:35
Hi Stephanie,

It's not really that unusual for friends and family to be suspicious and less than helpful if they know little or nothing about Buddhism and don't feel the need for spiritual investigation in their own lives.

I wouldn't worry about it too much, you can gradually learn to demonstrate without words how the Dhamma is benefiting you, by your patience and kindness towards others and making your daily life your practice.

When I first discovered Buddhism I wanted to tell everyone I knew about it - but eventually realised that it wasn't such a good idea because they mostly weren't interested and thought I'd been brain-washed, lol !

With kind wishes,

Aloka :hands:

02 Oct 13, 18:00
Thank you very much! I am very greatful to have found this affirming community!

02 Oct 13, 23:06
Hi stephanie. I can confirm what Aloka said. It is a common occurance, our family and loved ones not understanding our seemingly religious pursuits. My friends and family usually have other interests like shopping, watching tv or partying, and even the most open-minded and thoughtful ones, who would approach me, inquire by themselves and develop some understanding, would quickly loose interest due to having many other interests and hopes.

It would seem rather natural that way.

I have dealt with it by not making a big deal out of it. If your worldly obligations are done and not in the way, don't be driven into a guilt trip, then your family and friends will learn to understand and appreciate.

Good luck.

Mu Chak
20 Nov 13, 20:23
Hi Stephanie,

What you're going through is normal; so keep that chin up ;D When we take up a spiritual way of life, friends and family may wonder what's going on. In my own experience, when I began a regular meditation practice, I wanted to tell everyone about what I was doing and why and encouraging them to get started on a spiritual journey too. I learned very quickly that wasn't the best course of action to take. We all go through this at some point on our path, so have heart and keep at it~

In the tradition I study and practice, we cultivate a way of life that becomes an attraction versus trying to prove ourselves. The more we practice, opportunity opens up for, "Hey, what's going on with you--you've changed, what have you been up too?" Then, you can decide if you want to share some of your spiritual experiences or not. This really happens among family and friends as we continue on the path with dedication and diligence. You'll see ;)

Keep giving your best, pray for their well-being and healing and take good care of yourself~