View Full Version : Trying to be nobody.

04 Jul 12, 18:01

This is probably a bit more than is normal for an introductory post, so let me know if I should post it somewhere else.

I'm 27 and live in Philadelphia, PA, USA. I've been an atheist for over 25 years. In the last year, I've had a lot of spiritual experiences, some through ayahuasca, and some through meditation (the ayahuasca led me to meditation, as I want some more permanent transformation). Once, I experienced a being that could only have been God, which was incredibly blissful, omniscient, and all-compassionate, and more real than regular life experiences, but I have also had many experiences that had nothing to do with God that were equally or more awesome. Before I discovered Buddhism, I thought I should try to get that God experience back and make it permanent, but now I have to wonder whether that would just be a distraction from realizing anatta.

I have always wanted to help others, but since I've been exposed to spiritual experiences and Buddhism, I have realized that I don't even know what it means to help people in a real way (though I still donate to CARE just in case being trying to be nobody isn't the answer). I am thinking of becoming a monk (perhaps at Bhavana Society).

I am currently just learning of David Deida and have just ordered his book, Blue Truth. He's some kind of neo-tantric ex-(?)neuroscientist maverick who has dabbled in all kinds of semi-productive methods for exploring the occult nature of reality (psy, reincarnation, etc), but he admits that he is not enlightened, which makes me doubt the ultimate usefulness of his ideas, but I wonder if anyone has anything else to say about him.

with metta,
joel, the aspiring nobody

04 Jul 12, 18:26
Hi joel :wave:

Welcome to BWB !

This welcome and introductions forum is just for that purpose - so if you want to ask questions or discuss something, please do so in the other forums on the website.

(The Tea Room is the place to discuss non-Buddhist writers.)

with kind wishes


04 Jul 12, 21:19
Hi NobodyToBe,

Welcome to Buddhism Without Boundaries!


05 Jul 12, 01:22
Be welcome NobodyToBe,


21 Jul 12, 15:45
Welcome, NobodyToBe!
Hope Buddhism provides you with some answers!